You said something wrong? Or maybe they did? Or the whole thing is in it – and, if so, he is not worth you? Family therapists have found 9 most likely answers to the question tormenting you. So why weren’t you called for a second date?
1. The one you met did not feel the attraction
Anyway, it is better to know the truth than to be deceived. Only half of those who came to a consultation with Jenny Apple, a coach in the field of relations from Los Angeles, said that on the first date they felt something for their chosen one. The rest said that there was no physical interest and they did not want to talk about it directly in the correspondence or by phone.
“My advice is not to take it to heart. These are statistics, which means that it will be more than once, and not only with you. For one who did not feel the attraction for you, you will have two those who will find you physically
attractive “.
2. It is just poorly brought up
This is the first thing that comes to mind when your new acquaintance has not called back and disappeared. Such people exist, and it is quite possible that this is your case. Those who are not ready for relationships often disappear without warning – or those who have other priorities. Perhaps he decided to return to his previous relationship or still look. In any case, his disappearance can only be welcomed.
3. You “brought with you” the former
Do not go to the dark side of the street, discussing the former relationship, and even more so-complaining about them, says Fei Goldman, a coach from New York. “No one wants to see anger on your face and listen to unpleasant things on the day when he first sees you. The interlocutor will begin to imagine himself in the place of who you are talking about, and this will make him run away from such a relationship. “.
4. Your date was more like an interview
I want to know so much about your new acquaintance: what if this is the same person with whom you will spend your whole life? Quite possible. But try not to harm, falling out a whole series of questions that will make a person feel like an interview when applying for a job, says Nili Steinberg coach.
“Sometimes lonely people are too careful and want to know about their possible chosen one to the smallest detail, when the connection itself is still very thin. This causes a desire to defend himself from such an aggressive interest. Do not overdo it”.
5. The first date was too long
For the first date, it is most often advised to choose a small cafe. To drink coffee, half an hour is enough. During this time, you can chat, without leaving for the wilds, leave a good impression of yourself and interest. Therefore, the Coach of Damon Hofman advises customers to allocate for an hour or two on the first date and no more.
The tale of Cinderella was also about this.
“It is important to maintain energy at the maximum, the date should end as if in the middle. Then, having met you next time, a man will expect a continuation, and he will be interested in “.
6. You have not shown your interest
Maybe you often responded to messages on the phone. Or looked aside and almost never looked into his eyes. Or you had the same appearance that there would be business and more interesting. These are only a few examples of what may seem like interest, says May Hu from South California. “And do not forget to look into the eyes of your new acquaintance, otherwise you will be considered ill -mannered”.
